MAD & SICK. A few seconds,hours,days,weeks and a month back,I was so pissed with myself .Not just that,I am totally damaged by my own self, my own actions, my own choice.Things that I souldn't be done or even think about it,my unwanted nightmare,my painful history are now my best friends.REPEAT:My worst enemy ever is now my best freind.
I cried non-stop,thinking about the mistakes,the regret,the 'heart-attack',the uncounatble tears,the unsolved puzzle,the unanswered questions when this particular part of my life RETURNS.Honestly,I really don't know the mistakes that I shouldn't be done in this path.I mean I can see it but it is unclear,uncertain.I am still confuse and looking for the missing piece.No one how much have I suffer because of this mistake except for Him.I m half mad,insane,depressed and stress at the moment.
Everyday,I put up my fake smile,the have-to-laugh face,act as if everything is fine but the truth?I m dying inside alone,crying painfully and hoping for the impossibles.I don't even know to whom I should share my feeling,my tears,my madness.So,I decided to see a psychiatrist soon enough.Yes,I m officially SICK.
PS:I m thinking about leraning guitar.Why?I want to be a romantic person and maybe turn up my poems to songs.
MAD & SICK.
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